How did this happen? How did Judas go from giving up everything to follow Jesus, to betraying Him for a miserable thirty pieces of silver? The beginning of Judas’ downfall, perhaps, was his secrecy. In the beginning of his discipleship, Judas Iscariot was, must have been, open with Jesus, sharing his thoughts, his dreams, his desires, and his fears like any of his apostles. And then, little by little, Judas became disillusioned and jaded. He withdrew into himself. He cloaked his temptations, his fears, his struggles, and his failures. The first time we hear from Judas in the Gospels, he is erupting with fury over Jesus being anointed with the costly oil. Judas had bottled up his anger, instead of bringing it to Jesus.
Something very similar happens when a soul stops going to confession, or confesses too infrequently, or puts off going to confession. One becomes accustomed to living with the sickness of one’s secrets. One adjusts to living with them, and they poison the soul. This need to confess has always been valued by the Church. How important it is to lay bare our souls to a trusted spiritual father, to admit not only our sins, but also our temptations and our struggles. This act of humility disarms Satan, and renders him powerless. When we fail to confess our sins and, instead, hide them, we give the Evil One a foothold in us. Failure to confess sin will almost always lead to estrangement from God and resentment toward the Church and other Christians.
Judas must have stopped conversing with Jesus in a personal way. Certainly he continued talking to Jesus superficially, but mostly about business. He was, after all, responsible for administering the common fund of the Twelve. He stopped relating to Jesus in a personal way, as one trusting friend talks to another, heart to heart.
Hopefully, our Lenten observances have helped us to trust Jesus more deeply. Hopefully, we have encountered him in quality prayer, and not simply superficial babbling in his general direction. Hopefully, we have opened our hearts to Jesus, to allow him to see our woundedness and frustration. Hopefully, unlike Judas who was filled with greed and selfishness, we have learned to serve Jesus lovingly and generously. If not, it’s not too late.
We will be invited over the next three days very close to Jesus’ heart. Jesus freely undergoes the events of the Paschal Triduum out of love for us and the desire to save us from our sins, from our Judas-like tendencies and experience the true freedom of the children of God for the glory of God and salvation of souls.
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For increased faith and understanding in the catechumens and candidates who approach the sacraments of initiation in the coming Paschal Solemnity.
That those in need may find assistance in the charity of faithful Christians and that peace and security may be firmly established in all places.
For strength to resist temptation, and the humility to sincerely repent of sin.
That through fasting and self-denial, we may be ever more conformed to Christ.
For all who have died, and for all the poor souls in purgatory, and for X. for whom this Mass is offered.
Mercifully hear, O Lord, the prayers of your Church and turn with compassion to the hearts that bow before you, that those you make sharers in your divine mystery may always benefit from your assistance.
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