This last Wednesday was the feast of one of my favorite
saints, one of the great Doctors of the Church, St. Francis de Sales.
Francis de Sales was a bishop in France in the turbulent
decades following the Protestant Reformation. At the age of 35, he was
installed as bishop of Geneva, Switzerland, the epi-center of Protestant Calvinism.
Through his persuasive preaching he saved many souls from the errors of
Calvinism, winning many converts to the Catholic Church; yet at the same time his
life was often threatened by hostile Calvinists.
To serve his flock, as Bishop, St. Francis de Sales became a
prolific writer—his writings comprise 26 volumes. Two of his books have become spiritual
classics and continue to be published and read to this day: The Introduction to the Devout Life, and
The Treatise on the Love of God, both
books offering practical advice for Catholics living in the midst of the world
who wish to pursue a life of sanctity. Either one would be perfect spiritual
reading for Lent, which is approaching very quickly.
Also, ordinary folk would often write to Bishop Francis for
spiritual guidance. Once, a young mother asked him, “Bishop I’m trying very
hard to live a good life, to be holy. I’d like to get to Mass every day, but I
can’t because I have these seven children who are driving me crazy.” Francis de Sales wrote back to her and said
“Madam, it’s not necessary that you go to Church every day; you become a Saint
by being the best mother you can be.”
I thought of Francis de Sales, one, because his feast was
last week, but also, after hearing St. Paul’s words to the Corinthians this
week: “An unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how he may
please the Lord. But a married man is anxious about the things of the world,
how he may please his wife, and he is divided. An unmarried woman or a virgin
is anxious about the things of the Lord, so that she may be holy in both body
and spirit. A married woman, on the other hand, is anxious about the things of
the world, how she may please her husband.”
St. Paul is in no way denigrating marriage here. He even
says so. He says, “I tell you this not to impose a restraint”, in other words,
I’m not telling you this so you don’t get married, but so that married and
unmarried alike may seek to serve the Lord according to their own vocation. I
think, St. Paul would very much agree with the advice St. Francis de Sales gave
to that young mother. Madam, you are to become a saint…and your road to
sanctity involves being the best wife and mother you can be.
St. Paul is showing the dual value of marriage and celibacy.
Some members of the Church are called to celibacy “for the sake of the
kingdom”, to be about the work of the Church with undivided devotion. I know so
many priests and nuns and religious brothers whose lives are filled with joy
and profound love for the Lord. They are not unhappy because they aren’t married.
Celibate service to the Church is not an unhappy, lonely existence. It’s a
profound immersion into the charitable life of the Church, and I think every
young Catholic needs to discern if God might be calling you to some form of celibate
service.
Celibate priests and religious serve as a sign to the whole
Church that the Lord calls all of us to offer offer up the whole of our lives
to God. I celebrated a wedding a few years ago on the Feast of St. Agnes, which
is on January 21, another good January saint. And so for part of the wedding
homily I told the story of saint agnes, who was a virgin martyr of Rome.
When Agnes was about thirteen years old, the son of the
Roman governor became infatuated with her.
He asked for Agnes’ hand in marriage, but already at that young age,
Agnes had given her heart to Christ—and consecrated herself to the Lord’s
service.
The governor’s son became bitter and angry, he tempted her
with priceless jewels, but she resisted.
He then threatened her, and told her that he would accuse her of being a
Christian. This meant that she would
face death if she did not give in, since it was against the law to be a
Christian. But, with her heart belonging to Christ, she boldly resisted
him. So, he accused her of practicing
the Christian faith, and she was beheaded.
Pope Benedict, in a reflection on Saint Agnes, said, “Her
martyrdom illustrates “the beauty of belonging to Christ without hesitation.”
And here’s the lesson for young married couples and old married couples. For
each of us, no matter our vocation, are called to belong to Christ without
hesitation.
St. Paul, writing about these married and unmarried people
recognizes that marriage is often a very difficult Christian vocation. So many
of you here no doubt could relate. How hard it is to balance your faith
obligations with your obligations to family. How hard it is to balance prayer
with laundry and yard-work and changing diapers and teaching your children
reading, writing, and arithmetic, and getting them to sports practice.
So again, St. Paul isn’t denigrating marriage here. The
Church needs happy, healthy, holy marriages, where parents set good religious
example for their children, teaching them to balance faith and worldly
obligation. But it’s certainly an admonition isn’t it, a reminder, that amidst
all the busy-ness of your temporal affairs, you need to ensure that you keep
Christ at the center of it all. That you as spouse and parent seek to belong to
Christ without hesitation.
To keep Christ at the center, he needs to be at the
beginning and at the end. So, it’s important to begin your day with prayer and
end your day with prayer, begin and end meals with prayer, begin and end car
trips, and yardwork and housework.
Listen to this simple, practical prayer, composed by St.
Francis de Sales. A wonderful prayer that you might consider beginning your day
with: “My God, I give you this day. I offer you, now, all of the good that I
shall do and I promise to accept, for love of you, all of the difficulty that I
shall meet. Help me to conduct myself during this day in a manner pleasing to
you. Amen.”
To offer God all the good that we shall do, means to
remember God when you are driving to work so you can provide for your family,
in folding the laundry, in putting the kids to bed, taking care of a sick
spouse. It doesn’t necessarily mean going to mass every day, though, if you
can, you should. But it certainly means belonging to Christ in whatever you do,
thinking with his mind, loving with his heart, becoming the best mother, the
best father, the best spouse, the best student, the best nun, the best priest
you can be, for the glory of God and salvation of souls.
