John, Peter, and Judas: three disciples with three different
responses to Jesus in today’s Gospel.
John, the beloved disciples lays his head on Jesus’ chest . Peter, confesses his desire to follow Jesus
even unto death, but at the sight of the cross flees in fear. And Judas, with betrayal in his heart goes
into the night.
Like John, we can have those moments of great intimacy with
Jesus, of deep prayer and unshakable love for the Lord. It is this same disciple who stands at the
cross with the Blessed mother.
Like Peter, we can be so pious and enthusiastic one moment,
saying, “Master, I will lay down my life for you”, and then the next moment
running away in fear. How does that
enthusiasm so easily turn into sinful fear?
My guess, it was the sight of the cross.
Not the hypothetical one, but the real one. Of actually seeing what it means to suffer,
Peter fled, his inflated enthusiasm deflating like a broken balloon. Jesus knows precisely how many times we will
deny him in the course of our life, yet he calls us to follow him and witness
to him just the same.
And then sometimes we can be like the silent Judas, rejecting
the light and slinking off into the darkness.
If we are honest, I think we’ve all had wonderful John
moments, naïve Peter moments, and dark Judas moments.
This Holy Week, we recall the extreme suffering and pain of
Jesus, which he endured because of his great love for us. We do well, like John the beloved, to incline
our ear to Jesus’ heart, to be honest with him about our fears and weak
enthusiasm, those parts of his which need to be exposed to his light, and also
allow him to strengthen our love for him as we journey with him to the cross,
for the glory of God and salvation of souls.
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